Attention Single moms! A post you need to read...

As a single mom, a lot of us hope to find Mr. Right. A man that loves us, and a man that loves our children too. A lot of women find this. But many single moms are hooking up with men and losing a lot more then they ever bargained for.

Across the news daily, you will see news reports of the mother's boyfriend murdering their child. Women need to WAKE UP! To many single moms are so desperate for a boyfriend that they are risking their children in the process.

When you are a mother, that changes the whole ball game. Remember that anyone you date, you are exposing to your child too. All to often, women are hooking up with guys that they basically know nothing about. There is no other way to word it. These women are desperate. Desperate to be involved with someone. They avoid the warning signs because they are afraid the guy will leave them, and they will be manless again. After avoiding the warning signs of abusive behavior, the next thing you know their child ends up dead.

This is unacceptable to me. I feel that if the mother had warning signs and knew that the boyfriend was not acting "quite" right towards her child, there should be some type of action taken against her as well. Children are to precious to risk. An "instant" relationship is not worth this.

Children can't always tell what's going on. They may not be able to put it into words. A man like this is always going to have the right explanation. No child can defend themselves against this type of situation.

There are many ways to avoid this type of situation.
1. Don't be desperate for a relationship. When people are desperate they sometimes overlook things they shouldn't. Remember, when you are a mother it changes everything. Not only are you exposing yourself, but you have an innocent, defenseless child that is relying on you 100%. A child that may not be able to tell you anything. Could you live with the consequences if you ended up with a man that hurt your child? No matter how great a guy seems, that doesn't mean he truly is. Of course any psycho is going to act perfect around you if they aren't quite right in the head. They don't want to be found out.


2. Don't rush into living together or having your boyfriend care for your child. A common scenerio. I've read a lot of news reports about boyfriends that kill their girlfriends children. I hate to be so blunt about this, but it needs to be said. It happens a lot when the mother isn't around. When the mother asks the boyfriend to pick her child up from daycare while she's still at work. When the mother asks the boyfriend to watch her kid while she's going shopping. Or when the they are living together and the mother just leaves the child with him to watch all day. For God's sake, please don't jump into leaving your child alone with a man even if you think you know him inside and out.

3. If you see any warning signs, even one GET OUT OF THE RELATIONSHIP. To many of these mothers of a murdered child look back and wish they would have left when warning signs first started. But they stayed because they "hoped everything would work out", or the boyfriend told them that they wouldn't do it again, etc. If you see warning signs and you stay in the relationship, you are just as bad as they are. Have no doubt about that. You are doing the worst thing in the world by risking your child. If you are so desperate that you can't keep your child safe, you need help yourself. If nothing else, tell someone what is going on and it might be time to consider letting your child live with someone else. In a safe household. Whatever you do, don't keep a child in a household where your boyfriend is having anger problems toward your child etc.

4. Always trust your instinct.


5. Again, I want to say don't be desperate. Take your time getting to know someone. When they are around your child, watch them. Don't rush into anything.


Here are just a few reports in the last few months of children being murdered by their mother's boyfriend. This is real, and it's happening to women and children all over the country. Read these reports.

http://www.philly.com/dailynews/opinion/20071214_Christine_M__Flowers___MOMMIE_DEAREST.html



http://www.philly.com/dailynews/local/20071211_Elmer_Smith__.html



http://www.wishtv.com/global/story.asp?s=8945



http://www.abcnews.go.com/US/story?id=3597168&page=1


Please take the time to read these stories. It is happening daily across the country. If you are a single mom that thinks it couldn't happen to your child, think again. It is happening, and none of these mothers thought it would happen to their child either.